Over the weekend I went to a gay pride parade with my gay male friend as a supporter, and that was fine, I was asked a few times if I was a lesbian, but I nicely said no, I am here to support my friend, and that was also fine. But I went with him to one of his friends’ places for a few drinks, and two of the guys were getting ready for the night, they were dressing up in drag, and that was fine. But what I don’t understand is why gay men want to be or portray themselves as women? Or females want to be or portray themselves as men? Even going so far as getting sex changes, and that’s fine, its their right and their lives to live how they want, but do men really understand that being a girl is hard, for instance; we get periods, we get unwanted hair on our bodies and face, we have to be beautiful, we have to be perfect, we need to fit in, we get stressed over things, we like to dress like slobs sometimes, we like to eat like slobs sometimes, in general women don’t live glamorous lifestyles that drag queens portray when they dress as women. I realize that it’s for fun and for a good time, but I don’t really see the point in some of the outfits that are worn? It is like they view women as hookers and glamour dolls, but isn’t that in its self judging and stereotyping women, and isn’t having a gay pride parade supposed to get away from judgment and stereotyping of the gay community? I think that being gay if fine, but be proud of who you are, not of who you are not, which is either a man or a woman, which ever the case may be!
What is the point of a cross dresser? drag queen or drag man?
Just because a man is gay doesn't mean that he enjoys crossdressing. And just because a man crossdresses doesn't mean that he's gay.. So why crossdress at all and why crossdress in wierd ultra feminine outfits?
Its in his brain... When a compulsive crossdresser wears women's clothes his brain releases a series of neurotransmitters which give him a sensation of well-being, sexual gratification, pleasure and self-identity. His brain is just hard wired this way. I don't know why all men don't get the same response.
So for the compulsive crossdresser he will feel that he NEEDS to wear women's clothes. He NEEDS that sensation he first got from crossdressing. Then he will find that in order to get that sensation he needs to go further and further to what is registered in his brain as feminine/sexy. Yes it does sound like an addiction. It many ways the urge to crossdress is similar to an addiction response. He is trying to achieve a stimulation.
For some reason the crossdresser will also get a feeling of self-identity with crossdressing. This will lead to him creating an alter-ego. He will even give "her" a name. He will do anything to this alter-ego he creates and after a while he will even "love" his own alter-ego. In its final stages he has a sex change.
Reply:The answer chosen as the best answer is COMPLETELY wrong. It's obviously conjecture from someone who knows nothing about crossdressing or transgender experience. I mean..."in the final changes he has a sex change"??? Has this dude ever even MET a drag queen?... Report It
Reply:...First of all, here's some distinctions. Drag queens are men who dress as women for performance reasons (which is part of why it's so over-the-top; it's a show, not reality). Report It
Reply:...Crossdressers experience their gender in different ways, depending on the person, but I tend to distinguish them from drag queens in that they dress as women in a way that is not so focused on performance, but they often still identify as men, and not actually want to be female. Report It
Reply:...Transsexuals are those who live or wish to live full-time as women and these are the people that generally get sex reassignment surgery. All of these people can be attracted to women and men, and may identify as gay, straight, bisexual, whatever, depending on the person, same as anyone else. Report It
Reply:Although there are people who get sexual gratification from crossdressing, NOT ALL PEOPLE DO, and gender expression is NOT an "addiction" any more than girls who wear lipstick are addicted to lipstick. Report It
Reply:...Everyone has a gender expression, it's just that some people's internally-felt genders are more unusual, so their expressions of them are more often misunderstood by people. Report It
Reply:...I hope that makes sense. Don't believe what this guy says...and even my answer is a simple one for such a complex issue of gender expression...there are websites out there with much better explanations. Report It
Reply:...Research the term "transgender" (an umbrella term for everybody whose gender identity/expression doesn't match up perfectly with standard ideas of masculinity and femininity) Report It
Reply:...there's a whole world of really interesting information on the topic to be had on the web.
Hope that helps. Or at least mediates some damage.... Report It
Reply:Human beings, stripped of their society’s brainwashing (they grew up believing they HAD to behave a certain way by something irrelevant like race or sex) are individual. So realistically, gender is a myth. There are biological sexes, but since they don’t matter and therefore no real such things as “gender” exists, there ARE no cross dressers. Just people dressing like what they want to. Whether that’s very flashy and with pink dresses; macho with leather and muscle shirts, or anywhere on the spectrum. In a way, the fact that they polarize OPPOSITE to what they are (not who) it is essentially a rebellion. They are probably actually somewhere in the middle, but are driven to defiance by anger or frustration.
Reply:No, being a girl is hard for some. Not every woman is obsessed with being perfect and skinny. I don't have to be beautiful. I don't need to be perfect or fit in. Yeah, periods suck but look at it from another perspective: it means we are able to experience the miracle of creating life. I'm sure there are men out there who would gladly take on this icky burden to be able to bear children! I am a transgendered woman, I identify more with men, and I tend to act masculine. I don't give a darn about body hair. I don't shave my legs or pluck my eyebrows because society deems I should do it. I feel it's unnecessary and doesn't make me less of the person I really am. So don't say all women want to be perfect. I could care less about how people view me! But even though I am not so concerned about looking feminine most of the time, sometimes it is nice to get dressed up. Sometimes I put on makeup and heels because I feel like it, and it makes me feel so pretty. But it's not who I am. Haven't you ever dressed up, way more than you usually would, and thought, "Man I look hot" ? It's the same way for the men who like to dress in drag. You can look perfect and act perfect all you want to, however you think society wants you to be, but don't tell others how to act. There is so much more to gender and sexuality than just "man" or "woman". It it not so black and white. This may be why the rainbow represents the LGBT community, we make up a whole spectrum of differences!!!!
Reply:I will do my best to answer this, it is not easy because there are so many questions and I can see you dont quite undstand some of the differences.
A DragQueen can be gay or straight, more are gay. The ones I know like to do it strickly as an artistic expression. Often they are up on stage and must over do everything because of the harsh lights... But it is a form of art. Very beautiful art in its own way.
CrossDressers will often dress for a few reasons, I cant go into all of them because of the open forem and minors reading. But one of the reasons is to simply express how they feel. They may feel like they have a female and male sole and need to express both parts to feel whole.
The TransSexual feels that they were born in the wrong body. You talked about the pain and how hard it is to be a girl. Just imagine being trapped in the wrong body. The pain is bad enough that many cant deal with it and commit suicide. The ones that transition arnt looking for glam... They just want to be themselfs and feel whole, just to be them and fit in.
Often the parade is GLBT and not just Gay. It is also ment to catch peoples attn and if someone wants to express themselfs and that helps get attn then it is great. The more eduication that is done the better.
That is quick and straight to the point while trying to inform and not get to boreing LOL.
Hope it helps, If you would like more I can try to explaine it.
Hugs Kim Lynn
Reply:It's gender expression. It's about being who you are, showing a side of yourself, being comfortable, and with drag shows and such, having fun. It's about being able to show a side of yourself you normally don't and being free with it.
Reply:To ans your question. I think like the rest of our society people have this ideal image of things. Like people thinking if they become a girl it will make things different, when it does not.
John
Reply:Dawn that was along one and I sped read it but no I can see your point. But you have to think sweetheart that most of these things are done for charity. Well I hope they are because this happens in Manchester in England and everything collected goes to charity. The people here dont want to denigrate women or the female sex. But just do it for fun and charity. I agree that a woman feels the need to be perfect and god only knows why we are not but we have to work on it all the time. dont get overweight, dont have hair, hair should be beautiful along with the dress style and makeup. Dont get down at it babe it is all fun.
Reply:Oh, most drag queens know real women aren't like that--I mean, most of them had women in their families growing up. But I think the glamour and the over-the-top aspect of those getups and performances are more about just that--performances--than they are about reality. For instance, transsexual women, by and large, don't dress like drag queens--they dress like average women (I mean there's always exceptions, and let's face it there's the occasional female-born woman who likes to dress like a drag queen--but it's a good general trend).
I'm sure there are some ignorant drag queens just as there's always ignorant people in any group...but they'd have to be really oblivious not to notice that not every woman is super-high-femme and dressed to the nines! They're just having fun with taking femininity and gender-bending to its extreme for the purposes of expressing that supremely glamourous person within, and just having a good time...basically playing "dress up." haha.
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